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The Rival American

Welcome to The Rival American, a university-unaffiliated media publication run by students, for students. We produce opinion editorials, culture critiques, student journalism, and even silly jokes.

 
Tired of Left vs Right; Nation Yearns for a More Bipartisan, Less Divisive Twix
Tired of Left vs Right; Nation Yearns for a More Bipartisan, Less Divisive Twix

It’s a question that will determine the future -- nay, the survival -- of the country. Will Trick-or-Treaters and candy buyers alike choose to support right or left Twix in the upcoming Halloween season?

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CultureRow SullivanOctober 28, 2021
Meet Your New Classmates; The Majors of Halloween’s Favorite Villains
Meet Your New Classmates; The Majors of Halloween’s Favorite Villains

There are already some scary characters on campus and just when you thought the student body was spooky enough, here’s where your favorite horror movie figures would end up if they decided to go to American University.

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CampusNora LewisOctober 28, 2021
Would You Survive the Squid Game: AU Edition?

After finishing the show, I began to wonder what some of the games would look like on AU’s campus. See how many challenges of Squid Game: AU Edition you could complete without being eliminated!

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Shea NearyOctober 14, 2021
Are You The Old Soul of Your Friend Group? A Self-Help Guide to Figuring Out Why Your Friend Accidentally Called You “Mom” That One Time.
Are You The Old Soul of Your Friend Group? A Self-Help Guide to Figuring Out Why Your Friend Accidentally Called You “Mom” That One Time.
Culture, SatireJackie LambOctober 12, 2021
True Crime: Looking into the Disappearance of Wonk Cat
True Crime: Looking into the Disappearance of Wonk Cat

Fellow wonks, a dark day has fallen upon us.

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CampusRow SullivanOctober 7, 2021
Confused Students Across Campus Struggle to Comprehend That Professors Have Feet
Confused Students Across Campus Struggle to Comprehend That Professors Have Feet
Campus, SatireThe Rival AmericanSeptember 1, 2021
Five WTF Things Guys Have Said on Hinge
Five WTF Things Guys Have Said on Hinge
Campus, SatireJackie LambAugust 25, 2021
How to Write an Email, as Told by Sylvia Burwell
How to Write an Email, as Told by Sylvia Burwell
Campus, SatireThe Rival AmericanAugust 16, 2021sylvia burwell, emmy goyette, email, Campus, campus life, satire
Remembering the Class of 2021: A Wonky Highlight Reel
Remembering the Class of 2021: A Wonky Highlight Reel

“It’s been a wild ride, Class of 2021, we hope you continue to live your best, Wonkiest lives for all of the years to come.”

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CampusThe Rival AmericanMay 10, 2021sylvia burwell, American University, challenge accepted, Wonk, Wonk Rat, wonk cat, Megabytes
Get your mom what she really wants this mother’s day: an arrest in the JonBenet Ramsey case
Get your mom what she really wants this mother’s day: an arrest in the JonBenet Ramsey case
Satire, CurrentThe Rival AmericanMay 6, 2021mothers day
OPINION- Challenge Declined: AU’s graduation plan is a sorry excuse for one of life's biggest moments
OPINION- Challenge Declined: AU’s graduation plan is a sorry excuse for one of life's biggest moments
CampusThe Rival AmericanApril 30, 2021
“Just send me my degree so I can move on,” students have mixed feelings after AU graduation announcement
“Just send me my degree so I can move on,” students have mixed feelings after AU graduation announcement
CampusThe Rival AmericanApril 26, 2021
Making Sense of Love: My Self-Discovery of Asexuality
Making Sense of Love: My Self-Discovery of Asexuality
Pride Week, CultureThe Rival AmericanApril 25, 2021
I Walk The Line: Being Not Straight and Acting Pretty Straight
I Walk The Line: Being Not Straight and Acting Pretty Straight

“I don’t necessarily know why I’m writing this. It’s pride week. I am proud.”

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Pride Week, CultureThe Rival AmericanApril 24, 2021cowboy, pride week, gay, straight
A soft coming out; the moments when you realized you weren’t quite straight
A soft coming out; the moments when you realized you weren’t quite straight
Pride WeekThe Rival AmericanApril 23, 2021
Hetero Dreams Yet Again Crushed By Sylvia Burwell
Hetero Dreams Yet Again Crushed By Sylvia Burwell
Pride Week, CampusThe Rival AmericanApril 23, 2021
An Asexual in Limbo: A Series of Thoughts and Feelings
An Asexual in Limbo: A Series of Thoughts and Feelings
Pride Week, CultureThe Rival AmericanApril 23, 2021
Video Game Men That Give Me the Most Gender Envy
Video Game Men That Give Me the Most Gender Envy
Culture, Pride WeekSammi BradleyApril 22, 2021
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