An Unexpected Piece of Theatre: The ACC Men’s Championship Game

Satire, CultureThe Rival AmericanMarch 19, 2019

American University leans into disgrace and creates new major

Satire, CurrentThe Rival AmericanMarch 4, 2019Michael Cohen, Satire

I threw up in Chipotle and they still made me pay for guac

Lucas Trevor gifts us with a haunting tale concerning one Mexican-American restaurant chain.

Satire, CurrentThe Rival AmericanFebruary 20, 2019Chipotle, food, personal essay

The 51 Wonkiest Things to do Instead of Sex with your Partner

Satire, CampusThe Rival AmericanFebruary 13, 2019sex week

Representation: The Dick Drawn On This Whiteboard is a Micropenis

Satire, CampusThe Rival AmericanFebruary 12, 2019Satire, sex week

If you can read this, stay away from AU!

Campus, SatireThe Rival AmericanJanuary 30, 2019snow, Campus, Satire

Art major loses jean jacket, sense of identity

Satire, CultureThe Rival AmericanJanuary 24, 2019Satire, Campus

I’m a proud wonk

What it means to be a wonk

Campus, SatireThe Rival AmericanJanuary 24, 2019Campus, Wonk, Satire

BREAKING: Wonk Rat Releases List of Demands

The American University campus is trapped under the pressure of an aggressive rodent. No, not Aramark, but the infamous creature come to be known as the Wonk Rat.