October Horoscope
Aries (Ram): March 21–April 19
Uh-oh Aries! You’re feeling off this week. Nothing seems to go your way! Make sure to leave extra time to run to catch your bus, and maybe double-check that your U-Pass is in your wallet before leaving the house. Beware of a political science major asking for help on homework– they may be trying to plagiarize your discussion post. Try spending the weekend recentering yourself, and remember this cosmic energy is not permanent!
Taurus (Bull): April 20–May 20
Taurus, take this horoscope as a sign to pump the breaks! You’ve been telling a LOT of tales, and they could come back to haunt you. Maybe it’s time to stop talking and start listening. If you do choose to keep talking, take a look around (using the ‘liberal arts head sweep’ of the parameter) to make sure the subject of your story isn’t behind you!
Gemini (Twins): May 21–June 21
Gemini, you’re going to be experiencing some troubles at home (or in your dorm room). Make sure to look at the situation from your roommate’s point of view -- would YOU want to be kicked out of your room at 11 pm on a weeknight? The Moon, who controls home life and nurturing abilities, is your planet of the week. If all else fails, turn to a mutual friend for advice, but make sure you know their loyalties first! It won’t help the situation if your roommate finds out you’ve been spreading your issues around campus.
Cancer (Crab): June 22–July 22
Cancer, you’re doing just fine. Nothing you do is wrong, and everyone should work around you and your plans. You’ll get the best study spot today and the Dav will take your preferred form of payment. (Author’s Note: the author is a Cancer, and may be biased)
Leo (Lion): July 23–August 22
Woah Leo! Watch out for academic troubles on the horizon. Midterm coming up? Maybe it’s time to put down the fake ID and time to crack open a textbook! Mercury, the planet of rational and critical thinking, is trying to shine its light on you this week through the clouds. The stars foretell that your upcoming exam will be harder than anticipated! Take this as a sign to invest back in your education. Try setting up to study in the library this week!
Virgo (Virgin): August 23–September 22
Virgo, this week is ruled by Venus, the planet of LOVE! If single, your Hinge matches should be increasing exponentially. You’re receiving attention from everyone– the cute barista, your work crush, AND the person who looks like a model on the bus! Don’t put your connections with the ones you love on the back burner. Take some time this week to plan some time with your special someone. If you haven’t met your special someone yet, set some time aside to FIND them!
Libra (Balance): September 23–October 23
Happy Libra Season, Libra!! For the next few days, everything is about YOU! Jupiter, a planet of growth and adventures, urges you to take a leap of faith. This can be as small as changing up your coffee order, or as big as adding a double major. The important thing is that you’re changing your routine for the better this week. After this change, you’ll feel more centered and ready to take on the rest of the semester.
Scorpio (Scorpion): October 24–November 21
Scorpio, you’re more in tune with the universe this week. Your gut is talking to you– are you listening? Saturn is helping you focus on things that matter this week. Let all other distractions fade away. Tune out the discussion posts on Canvas, and tune in to yourself. Make sure to always take stock of what you feel before acting. Take comfort in the idea that you know what will happen next. If you have the time, maybe pick up an extracurricular that allows you to channel your intuition– as a staff writer on the Rival American perhaps?
Sagittarius (Archer): November 22–December 21
Sagittarius, you’ve been working way too hard! It’s time to take a break. Have you been sitting in the library for hours? Studying in DMTI for so long even the math majors are concerned? It’s time to close the laptop, exit Notion, and put your textbook away! Try going for a walk, and reconnect with nature. The Sun, planet of self-awareness, is helping you address your faults this week. It’s great that you are working hard, but it’s not great if you burn out this early in the semester. Save that for finals week!
Capricorn (Goat): December 22–January 19
Poor Capricorn! You’ve been having a rough time lately. The Universe seems to be working against you. We’ve all been there. It’s important in these rough times to take stock in what, or who, makes you feel safe and comfortable. Don’t resist the temptation to crawl into bed early today! You need a massive amount of rest and relaxation. Reach out to those who make you feel better. Take warning, flu season is coming! You’re more prone to getting sick this week. Maybe stock up on some Airborne, and make an appointment at the Student Health Center in advance.
Aquarius (Water Bearer): January 20–February 18
Aquarius, the good energy you’ve been putting into the Universe is paying off! This week, you’ll find that things are just a little bit easier. Perhaps you’ll get a good group for a class project, or hear back from the internship you’ve been hoping for. Make sure to carry this good energy forward! As you gain rewards, someone in your life might be going through a rough patch. Stay humble around this friend– no one wants to be around someone who brags.
Pisces (Fish): February 19–March 20
Poor Pisces, always the last in the horoscope line-up. While this horoscopist may have run out of ideas, don’t fret! This means you’re free to make up your own destiny. Take heart in knowing that you don’t have to answer to anyone. Even this fortune teller doesn’t know what you’ll do next!